Why English is Hard to Learn: a little poem

We’ll begin with box, but the plural is boxes,
but the plural of ox is oxen, not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, and two are called geese,
but the plural of moose is never called meese.

You may find a lone mouse, or a handful of mice,
but the plural of house is houses not hice.

The plural of man is always men,
but the plural of pan is never pen.

If I speak of a foot and you show me two feet,
and I give you a book, would a pair be a beek?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be called beeth?

If the singular is this, and the plural is these,
Why shouldn’t the plural of kiss be keese?

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his, and him…
but imagine the feminime; she, shis, and shim!


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